You1) is the most bestest contestant on the island! He or she or they has all the adventures, which you2) sometimes get to look at. Oddly enough, you looks a lot like you, to the extent of sometimes being called by your name.3)4)5)6)7)8)9) It's slightly worrying that you doesn't object to this. Perhaps you is plotting to replace you.

1)
Note: capitalization of you's name only to be done at the front of a sentence.
2)
Not you, you. You understand?
3)
If you is getting misidentified as you, does you actually have a gender?
4)
Maybe we should call you it?
5)
Now all it needs is five children, and we can have magical adventures!
6)
Note: The previous footnote is an obscure literary reference. OUT OBSCURE IT, I DARE YOU.
7)
What are you saying here? E.Nesbit obscure? Surely not!
8)
Favourite sentence from her wikipedia page - “The Complete History is not the complete history.”
9)
Pish posh. Of course you have a gender. It's right over there, under the monkey.