Table of Contents

Zombies

The following description is the result of an interview conducted by a psychic with a Zombie in New Pittsburgh, the Zombie home. The written text is what the Zombie said, text in footnotes are his thoughts. The Zombie was first captured, then rendered immobile. No Zombies were hurt in the making of this interview.

General Description

BRAAAAAAAINS1). Our BRAAAAINS 2). We Zombies are particularly fond of BRAAAAAAAIN3). Because of our BRAAAAAAIN4) We are popular among certain demographics and nested ourselves into the BRAAAINS5)

Skills and Tactics

Our Zombie BRAAINNNS love6) BRAAAAINS. Because the BRAAAAINS 7) are 8) delicious 9). Raw BRAAAINS! 10) delicious BRAAAAINS. Our BRAAAIN 11) scientists 12) lovingly poked BRAAAAINS 13).

Other Characteristics

This is the last that could be read, the rest of the pages are covered in blood. It appears the Zombie had gotten excited after all that talk of brains and broke loose. As far as we know it is still out th—

1)
are the one thing we seem to lack, hence our appetite
2)
have turned to mush after watching too much TV and/or playing too many video games
3)
-games, such as Scrabble and Hunt-The-Human
4)
-based appetites, Zombies are incredibly intelligent.
5)
of the viewers at home. Combined with Kittymorphs, Improbable Island appeals to 99% of the 14-26-year-old-male demographic.
6)
the Island and are well adjusted. We can easily Fight and search for those lovely
7)
of ours are mostly deactivated, we aren't so susceptible to pain.
8)
in strong skulls we have Leathery Fists to crack skulls, to get to those
9)
BRAAAAAINS
10)
are the tastiest. We often don't bother cooking. We don't even have to bother cleaning the carcass - we can just dig into those
11)
moves on a slower level, and our bodies reflect that. Generally we just shuffle along.
12)
discovered the part of the BRAAAAINS that carries the ego and
13)
and Zombies are now proficient insulters